of feeling out of control
and thinking about my own mortality,
and I was very grounded in the present,
and thinking about my purpose,
and why was I here,
and questioning all sorts of stuff,
and I remembered those nights
just after 9/11, when I'd flown into Afghanistan,
so I went off and found a church.
I said to my husband,
"I need to give church another chance."
He didn't grow up in church,
but he was kind of like,
well, I'll go with you,
and we just started going to church there,
and I started a whole journey of questioning and discovering
and looking the faith I had as a child
through adult eyes
with all the experiences of life I had.
You know, it wasn't like I was missing something in my life.
I was blessed with a successful career.
I had a brilliant marriage.
You know, my family were healthy,
but there was just some sort of question underneath.
What was my purpose?
Why was I here?